Ello lil sparkles !!
All my life I have heard people talk about a physical quantity….you know something that can be measured…calculated…added …defined. But most often this physical quantity is judged. Velocity…distance …time is directly proportional to a lot of things but being a physics student I have never heard that weight is directly proportional to beauty.
Growing up being a chubby kid had always been hard. My friends …mates …colleagues…relatives heck even my parents never really thought that my size was a beautiful one. Family dinners and parties were filled with old people giving me DIY tips or gym numbers. Trainers that had made a difference before.
Even today people keep telling me that I’m curvy , for gods sake I know. I own a mirror and I love the reflection I see. My parents and relatives tell me to eat less or comment on my choices as if not eating a slice of pizza was going to make me happy. Lol
I failed to understand how or why being chubby and curvy when I was 5 and 6 was cute but when I’m 17 it’s obscene. I have tried numerous diets and countless ways but I was never taught to be happy in my own skin. My best friends are really skinny and they are so beautiful for me but they think I’m beautiful too even though I’m a few sizes extra and a few kgs over. I’m not unhealthy I don’t have health issues …then how does being curvy stop me from being beautiful.
I think it’s time for people to stop being crazy about size 0 cause I’m sure you can feel a perfect 💯 even if your a size 10. Last year I lost a few pounds. And I did that cause I thought it would be better for me so for people who asked me if I did it for a guy or if I was disgusted with myself the answer is NO.
If you think you need a change , do it for yourselves cause I think beauty comes in all sizes be it a zero or a hundred. And why should we let numbers define our infinite potential? So let me sparkle in my own size and let my fellow mates breathe in their own body!!
Lots of love
Ola My lil sparkles !!
Today as I write this post sitting in bed tears threatening to spill I think about the efforts. The ones that I have been making ,the ones that I chose not to make.
I think efforts co relate with decisions. If you decide to do something then to put it through you need to put some love , sweat and sparkle into it. 2 years back I made a decision to become a doctor. Next year this time I’ll be counting the days to write my Med School Entrance Exam. Ya gives me the creeps.
I knew it was gonna be tough. Heck it’s a lot tougher than I thought it would be. But the studies is not the hardest part of it. It’s the demotivation. That I get when my efforts are not recognised or they are not fruitful. When I spend sleepless nights studying on a test and then the results are not as good as I want them to be. And then my professors tell me that I have immense capacity I just need to work a bit more.
It kinda blows my mind away. But today I realised something. These efforts that I make might be enough for me but not enough for my future. Like a long time investment I’ll reap its benefits after a few years. When I’ll be earning a good living and being unconditionally happy.
So what I have decided from know on is I’ll put in the efforts. Maybe more than before and stop worrying about the outcome. I’ll always know that I tried and who knows in the near future these unnoticeable efforts will sparkle my life.
Love yourself and your dreams
Ello guys !!!
Happy Easter !!! My moms Christian so I get to celebrate easter and Christmas and all things nice. I also get to eat delicious food. Endless dishes and delicacies. We live really far from my grandmothers so whenever we come home she makes every dish that is on the menu.
I also get to eat splendid Easter eggs. My mom got a basket of chocolate Easter eggs home and within minutes they disappeared into thin air. The dark chocolate ones ….the white chocolates …the tiny mini ones as well as the huge giant ones. They all came with different wrappers different colours. But in the end they were all gone.
The sparkly glitter wrapped eggs left a sparkle in my mind. When it’s chocolate the size, shape ,colour ,covers don’t matter. But when it comes to something much more significant like people how does all this start to matter.
How do the dark skinned gods get an inferior preference when they too have a fair heart. How do the light skinned beauties get no credit for their hard work cause people think things come easy to the white.
We come in different wrappers but aren’t we all filled with delicious sweet stuff.
There are some Easter eggs whose expiry date has passed those you definitely need to throw away. But when the eggs are disfigured we still eat it all cause in the end it’s all just chocolate. Everybody has faults but in the end we all are humans trying to be happy.
So this easter when you eat an Easter egg learn to accept everyone cause we lovely sparkly people come in all shapes ,sizes and colours.
Lots of love
Ello guys !!!Summer is finally here. This time I have quite mixed feelings about it. Love the ice creams – Hate the sticky mess. Love the shorts- Hate to put away my jumpers. Love the vacations -Hate summer extra Tutions.
To get away from my busy little life and the scorching heat. I ran away to the Himalayas for a vacation. A blogpost related to that will be up next week. But while on this trip I realised something definite. I have found my happy space.
The last few months were a bit hard. Never showed it but getting into the whole medical entrance regime …new friends. Discovering who really had my back and who didn’t. But you know what ? I got through all of the above and a lot more with a smile in the end.
Earlier this year I read a quote saying Five years down the line none of the problems I have now would be significant. That made a huge impact on me. I found it so true. The problems I had when I was 5 are definitely not the ones I have now.
So I built a happy place. A place where I let myself be happy. Where the world could be happy with me. Where nobody is mean and everybody is themselves. The sooner I realised that the people trying to hurt me might be going through something worse the better I was able to cope up. A lot of people tell me I’m always happy. I can manage to make people laugh even when I don’t mean to. I’m utterly silly. You would know that if you talked to me for less than 5 minutes.
My best friend , he tells me almost every conversation we have that I live in a world of unicorns and rainbows. You tell me is that such a bad world to live in? I have designed the world the way I like it to be. And I have found that I’m much happier this way. I get hurt less ..
I still do have a lot of problems. The ones we all have. But I have my bestie (S) to get me through it. I decided that rather than telling the whole world about my problems it’s better to tell just one person. And let the rest of the world be a part of the happier more cheerful you.
So build your happy place. Find a nook or corner where you define the rules, the people ,the heart. I have found mine let me know if you find yours ??
Lots of love